Surreality

Pregnancy at this stage is so incredibly surreal. I can barely keep myself convinced that I actually am pregnant.

I mean, it's been a week since I last took a pregnancy test (I have to keep it on the bathroom counter, just to prove that I didn't imagine it!), and I have some general symptoms, but nothing really definitive has set in yet (still waiting on that morning sickness, bleh).

I think that, aside from just being terrified that I'll miscarry, the reason I'm so reluctant to tell anyone the "news" at this is point is that I feel weird sharing with other people something my own mind has yet to really accept. I guess, on the other hand, it's better for me to not fully accept it, in case something does go wrong (since there's still a higher possibility of that happening, at this point).

I don't know... It's crazy...

I just can't wait for all those things like hearing the heartbeat, feeling movement, or finally seeing a baby in there on an ultrasound to finally prove it to myself. It all seems so far away though! I don't even get to have my first prenatal visit until 12 weeks, I believe.

I don't know how I'll survive waiting the next several weeks!